  Duke Nukem Forever |
LAS VEGAS -- You wouldn't believe me if I said that I captured the Loch Ness Monster, or I've seen the alien corpses at Area 51, or I rode into work today on the back of a flying unicorn.
But believe this: I have played Duke Nukem Forever.
If that makes you scratch your head and say, "Yeah? So?" here's the short version of the backstory: Duke Nukem Forever, a sequel to the revolutionary 1996 first-person shooter Duke Nukem 3D, has been in development for 14 years. No, that's not a typo. Fourteen years. Nicknamed Duke Nukem For-Never, it was widely assumed the game would never see the light of day.
But like a winged unicorn majestically taking flight, Duke Nukem Forever is finally coming out. May 3, to be exact, on the Xbox 360, PlayStation 3 and Windows PCs.
To prove it, publisher 2K Games and developer Gearbox Software gathered media types in Las Vegas, sat us down in front of Xboxes and gave us two hours to play through the first chunk of Duke Nukem Forever. And I came away "¦ conflicted.
Twelve years after the events of Duke Nukem 3D, our muscle-bound, cigar-chomping, womanizing hero is now the most famous man in the world, having saved humanity's collective butt from alien invaders.
The game opens with the player, as Duke, peeing in a urinal in a football stadium locker room, leaving no question the series' sophomoric humour remains intact. Within minutes, we're running around the bathroom, turning on taps and hand dryers and even grabbing a piece of poop out of a toilet to fling at the walls. Why? Because the game lets you. No other reason than that.
Following a redux of Duke Nukem 3D's famous stadium battle with a giant one-eyed monstrosity, we realize this opening sequence is actually a game-within-a-game that Duke himself is playing, as he relaxes in his opulent Las Vegas penthouse while being tended to by a pair of pop starlets in schoolgirl uniforms. But Duke's day goes to hell when the aliens return and start ripping Vegas to shreds.
Over the next two hours of hands-on time with the game, we blast aliens to bits with shotguns, blow a giant spaceship out of the sky with a turret cannon, use advanced alien weaponry to mow down jet-packing xenomorphs, set laser-activated trip mines to blow up boar-headed foes and even get shrunk down to action-figure size to navigate a burning casino in a toy dune buggy.
We also sign autographs, lift weights, shoot some pool, play pinball, drive a remote-controlled car, microwave a bag of popcorn and buy everything from cigarettes to tampons from vending machines scattered around the game world. All the random interactivity we loved in Duke Nukem 3D is back in Duke Nukem Forever. And how.
Revisiting Duke's world is like slipping on a comfortable pair of old shoes. Yet the game feels oddly "¦ retro, somehow. Whether it's the overly straightforward shooting and puzzling action or the slightly dated pop culture winks, it's all a little too familiar, a little too deja-vu-y.
Of course, a two-hour taste of a game that's still a work in progress isn't a basis for judging the final product, and we're eager to go hands-on with the complete game (and its yet-to-be-revealed online multiplayer component) this spring.
But just as if you caught Nessie and put her in an aquarium for all the world to see, finally playing Duke Nukem Forever after a 14-year wait feels unavoidably anticlimactic. The mystery is over, the legend is reality, and all that remains now is to kick ass and chew bubble gum. And we're all out of gum.
DUKE NUKEM TIMELINE
LAS VEGAS - Long, strange trip doesn't even begin to describe it.
The saga of Duke Nukem Forever is the most convoluted and improbable tale of one video game's creation that the interactive entertainment biz has ever seen. And against all odds, it's just about over.
"We need an end to the story," is how Steve Gibson, vice president of marketing for Gearbox Software, succinctly puts it. That end is in sight: Duke Nukem Forever, the game that has infamously spent 14 years in development and cost tens of millions of dollars - much of it irrevocably wasted - will finally be in stores this May.
The game is the sequel to 1996's revolutionary Duke Nukem 3D, starring a wisecracking, cigar-chomping action hero defending Earth from an alien onslaught. Not because he wants to protect his fellow man, but because the aliens really piss him off. And hot babes love a saviour.
Because Duke Nukem 3D was such a monster hit, it gave the game's creators a huge amount of cash to fund a sequel, while also generating a ton of self-imposed pressure to make that sequel the biggest, baddest, best game of all time. Here, in timeline form, is the incredible journey of Duke Nukem Forever.
January 1996 - Duke Nukem 3D is released for home computers. A blend of shooting, exploration and raunchy humour, the game goes on to sell 3.5 million copies and garners universal critical acclaim.
April 1997 - A sequel called Duke Nukem Forever is announced by developer Apogee Software (later known as 3D Realms.) They predict the game will be on sale by the 1998 holiday season.
May 1998 - The first Duke Nukem Forever trailer is unveiled at the E3 video game trade show in Atlanta, showing off flashy visuals powered by the then-cutting edge Quake II graphics technology.
June 1998 - The game's developers decide to switch to the even more advanced Unreal game engine, but vow that changing the game's underlying technology won't cause a significant delay.
December 1999 - 3D Realms admits the changes in the core design technology led to chunks of the game being scrapped and redone, but the company sends out Christmas cards proclaiming Duke Nukem Forever will be out in 2000.
May 2001 - After more than a year of relative silence, 3D Realms makes a surprise appearance at E3 with a brand new Duke Nukem Forever trailer, and says the game will be out that year.
2001 - 2002 - Various revised release dates come and go, as the game's creators try to stay abreast of ever-advancing computer technology while adding more and more content to the game. Duke Nukem Forever's protracted development becomes a running joke in the industry.
2003 - The game's third publisher, Take-Two Interactive, reports Duke Nukem Forever will be out that year. That date is later amended to the beginning of 2005.
May 2005 - Duke Nukem Forever is expected to be on display at E3, but fails to make an appearance.
January 2006 - 3D Realms co-owner George Broussard says in an interview Duke Nukem Forever is essentially done and the company is just pulling all the elements together and making it fun.
August 2006 - The departure of several frustrated staffers over the previous 12 months sees the core Duke Nukem Forever development team wither in size. However, work on the game continues.
January 2007 - A new Duke Nukem Forever screenshot is released as part of an online recruitment ad seeking additional designers and programmers to work on the game.
December 2007 - A brand new Duke Nukem Forever teaser trailer is released, the first in six years. It shows Duke lifting weights and smoking a cigar, with only brief flashes of actual in-game action.
May 2008 - Footage of Duke Nukem Forever makes a surprise appearance on the web series The Jace Hall Show. Host Jace Hall, seen playing the game, tells viewers, "You're going to be pleased."
December 2008 - Another new high-resolution screenshot, this one showing a group of the game's enemies, is released.
May 2009 - Having spent more than $20 million of their own money making the game, 3D Realms asks publisher Take-Two Interactive for an additional $6 million. When negotiations break down, 3D Realms lays off all staff and declares Duke Nukem Forever officially dead.
May 2009 to May 2010 - A lawsuit filed by Take-Two over 3D Realms' failure to finish Duke Nukem Forever is ultimately settled. During this time, ex-employees quietly continue to work on the game behind the scenes.
September 2010 - In a surprise move, game development studio Gearbox Software reveals they've purchased the Duke Nukem Forever intellectual property from 3D Realms and the game is on track for completion in 2011.
January 2011 - Gearbox and publisher 2K Games announce Duke Nukem Forever will go on sale May 3, 2011, in North America, the first time in the game's 14-year development history a concrete release date has been set.
February 2011 - Journalists gather in Las Vegas for a hands-on preview of Duke Nukem Forever. "Our belief is if you deliver something that's fun, if you deliver a great game that people are excited to play, they feel gratified," says Gearbox's Gibson. "They don't talk about how long it took anymore."
steve.tilley@sunmedia.ca
